tic, tac, tic, tac...when time isn't mine

didn't have anything to blog lately...not that nothing's happening to me, it's just that nothing special has happened to me lately.

i've been trying to squeeze my schedules so i can have more time for leisure. summer is almost halfway and i haven't had the chance to hit the beach or the pool. there were invitations but there was just no time for it. i promised myself, though, that before the summer officially ends i'll definitely go and do what normal people do during summer...duh...take a trip somewhere and take a dip wherever it is peaceful and away from the city. hmm, Vigan is not a bad idea. although i've been there a couple of times before, i've not gone there on summer time. i'd like to go there again.

first week of May we're going up to Baguio for our annual staff retreat and planning. it's not pure vacation but it'll be good to "cool" down in the Pines City, away from the heat of Manila.

i worked up some good sweat playing badminton the other day. i went with some friends and we met up in the court in Quezon City. while resting after a few games with friends, a couple of chinese senior citizens went up to me and asked me if i could play with them, they need one person. so i agreed thinking that i would be doing "old" people a good thing. the first few hits and volleys were ok...i guess, we're still sizing each other up. but as the game progresses i noticed that these "old" chinese people, 60+ years old are good at playing the game. and i mean really good. and they're fast for their age. one time, i was trying to impress them so i kept smashing the shuttlecock but the other "old" man kept swinging it back to me, until finally i forced him to commit an error. but that did not happen until i had my tongue out catching my breath. to my surprise my teammate suddenly blurted "not bad for a 70-year old guy". my goodness! i was hitting against a 70-year old guy, a grandfather, and he didn't play like one. i actually thought he was only 45, as his real age doesn't betray him. after knowing they're that old i felt embarrassed to feel tired because they're not showing any sign of it. we won alright, but it was a close game. it was a good sweat.

it was a different feeling when i played in a tournament and i was playing against Paolo Bediones. we were orange team and they were red team. it so happened that in a crossover i was pitted against Paolo. our team captain told me i'd be playing against Paolo and told he'll introduce me first to him. then i saw him walked towards us, smiling. looking very friendly.

team captain: "Paolo, Rodel. Rodel, Paolo" (we shook hands...)
Paolo: "i think we've met before" (he's trying hard to be extra nice. i would remember that if ever!)
Rodel(keeping my cool): "no, not yet..." (laughs a little)
Paolo: "oh sorry sorry"
Rodel: "it's ok!" (laughs...)

and so after some niceties, we started the game. he was good and he hit some good shots. but the thing was, my teammates who were supposed to be cheering for me (we were teammates, remember) instead were cheering for Paolo whenever he hits a good shot. i tell you, they were so starstruck. and so i lost. but that was also a good sweat.

i had played against another Paolo before, Paolo Ballesteros, but it was another story.

by the way, i can't wait for the season 3 of Prison Break...the suspense is killing me.

could be better

i am having a bad day.

i got into an unnecessary discussion so early. i am needing information i can't get immediately. i can't force somebody to do what i needed her to do for me. i can't get someone to do what he is supposed to do because i can't get things to him. i feel terribly down and tired. i need to respond to important emails but i need more info at hand before i can do that. i have so many responsibilities i feel like escaping.

i am confused and i am incoherent.

it is so burning hot

i hate the weather..it is so burning hot, hot, hot!!! the weather temperature is so high somebody could die of heat stroke...seriously.

last night our whole family just couldn't stand the heat inside the house we went outside and stayed there for quite a while. a few seconds later, my tito and my tita (they live right next to our house) also went outside to cool down. 3 minutes later, some of our neighbors joined us and we almost had a mini-party going on just outside our homes. the men talked about the recent Pacquiao-Solis fight, the ladies discussed fashion stuff while the children played and shouted their lungs out. it was almost 96 degrees Fahrenheit outside but the friendliness among neighbors is warmer.

around 9pm, everybody retired inside and i went inside the room, turned on the airconditioner and watched DVD until i fell asleep.

i am now in my office and i love it here...i love the people i work with and i love the free airconditioner.

i need excitement

lately i've been waking up feeling like i have to drag both my feet and command my body to do things i needed to do, and not what i wanted to do... you know, like what a master does to its robotic slave.

i am a morning person. i would always greet the day with so much excitement...i never bother myself thinking about the problems i had and still have coming from the past day's adventures and misadventures. i am a sanguine, remember?

but the past few days have not been the same. i would wake up feeling the weight of my body pulling me back to bed. breakfast doesn't excite me anymore (who'd get excited if you're having mcdonald's almost everyday in more than a week). work isn't as attractive anymore. people aren't as accommodating anymore.

i miss the feeling of being giddy – the excitement of expecting something really exciting. something that would turn my tummy into knots, and something that would give me reason to wake up with a smile every morning.

maybe an iBook? :-)

loooong break...yahoooo!!!...har har har!!!

today is the last day of work, yippeee!...i am so wanting to take a break and just while away my time without giving any thoughts on work, meetings, reports and others. i am looking forward to spending time with my loved ones, and maybe take a short trip somewhere. malls will be closed on some days during the break and metro manila will be traffic-free for a while. ahh, it will be nice to just drive around and enjoy the stress-free roads in the metro. i think i am gonna do that.

yesterday i met with two of my friends whom i haven't seen in a while..7 months to be exact. the last time we saw each other was august 2 of last year. and to be nostalgic about it, we met where we last met. we rendezvous in the parking lot of Mandarin Oriental Hotel in Makati and we had lunch at the hotel's restaurant, Tin Hau. food was good, as usual, and we feasted on dimsum, beef, seafood, frog legs and a lot more in the buffet table. we had a good conversation catching up on a lot of things...from family to business to sports to technology to cars to scooters to guns and to pets. we spent a good 2 hours just chatting and eating until it was time to go. parting ways we scheduled another get-together sometime in May at 20/20 Restaurant in Bellevue Hotel in Alabang...i'm sure it will be another good time for us friends.

ooopps...i need to get DVD films today before i go home. it will be a long weekend, and i could use some of the time to watch movies at home...i hope they will have the complete season 2 of "Prison Break" soon.

of growin' up and growin' old

there’s an old cliché that goes “life begins at 40”. i guess it does when you don’t want to remember the years that came before you reached 40. but when the years that passed were years of bliss and harvest, then we can all say that life began the moment we decided to live it fully. biologically, we all grow old each year, each day, each hour... it's inevitable that we grow older in time.

a lot of people have been afraid of growing old. maybe because growing old leads to other health complications or maybe because we link it to inescapable death (which can actually strike at any point in our lives) or maybe because it leads to "looking old" which others dread so much. but I think that what we should actually fear is not growing old. i think more than that, we should be fearful of not growing up.

we might have different views about growing up. i think, as most things, growing up exists in a continuum with two extreme ends. there's Peter Pan who will always remain the boy who never grows up. and then there are others who are too serious in life who consider themselves all grown-up for being square about everything. for me, those who can balance enjoying life and still be matured enough to face the responsibilities that life holds for them are those who have truly grown. as always, it is a matter of balancing. and i for one, have to keep on telling myself that.

even if i’ve grown older, there's still a child in me that keeps on coming out. i still don't consider myself all grown-up... maybe because i still haven't truly balanced everything in my life. i still have my own questions about where i want to be, who i am, and how i can contribute something to society in my lifetime.

but i think that we all grow up, in one way or another... maybe not in the same pace as to how we grow old. sometimes we grow up slowly but other times, we experience "growth spurts" as well. if biology and time make us grow old, i think our experiences and our reactions to them are what make us grow up. it is no wonder that we could be stagnant for a year and even grow so much more in just a month or sometimes even a weekend.

i guess this is why i love experiencing new things. discovering life's beauty is a way of growing up along with discovering pain and fear. i don't have a perfect life but i have a happy one. :) i'm not all grown-up but i think i'm on my way there... smelling the flowers and jumping over thorns... enjoying the sunshine in the morning and basking in the moonlight at night.

life is all good, it is just a matter of how we live it. :)